I recently found a picture of myself taken as a negative via a camera effect.  I started to think about myself as “a negative” as I looked at this side of myself which the naked eye does not see.

I am not typically negative.  I try to have a positive outlook even though I have the tendency inside to see things beyond the spoon-fed black and white world most of us are digesting these days.  This can have several results which I fully accept as the way “I am” and the way my mind works.

Here are some examples:

• Something is presented as perfect, sunny side up, happy-go-lucky so to speak and we are just supposed to accept this as a fact- like a shiny, new shopping mall bringing a multitude of quality retailers to our area for our consumerism & pleasure.  Many get excited about this- wow, how convenient for the upcoming holiday shopping season- it’s right around the corner… where the strawberry fields used to be… uh oh… here is where it happens.  What happened to the strawberry fields? Are they being moved?  What is going to happen to the family that lived off the earnings of selling these strawberries?  Did big corporate America swoop in and convince them to sell their land or were they forced out in some other less lucrative way?  Will our strawberries have to come from farther away now and create more pollution to transport them?  I wish my own strawberries would grow in my garden so I didn’t have to worry about this…but what about my neighbors?  Then, the next thought comes in… what about the eco system of that land- many, many acres of land- wide open, green space that grew something natural would now be replaced by concrete, wires, and consumer goods.  Do we really need more things to buy?  There is no public transportation to this area (which is a whole other topic), so more gas guzzling, polluting cars will be brought to the area.  See how this works?  At every turn in this thought process, my positive spirit wants to find a good answer… they will have solar panels, they will have electric car charging stations, they will have charitable events to raise money for the local community who now needs to replace their lost strawberry income- ugh! It’s a vicious cycle isn’t it?

• Now, on the flip side, something is presented as having a negative effect up front and again, we are supposed to accept the status quo- most people will consider this a very BAD thing- and move on while a machine keeps running on this topic behind the scenes.  There are many examples of this in politics, legislation and government in general- too many to discuss here and I don’t like to get too political unless I feel very passionate about the topic being discussed.  For the sake of argument here, let’s use the example of how candidates spread negativity about each other leading up to an election. Whether true or not, this is a one of the reasons I don’t trust many politicians that are big enough to get the spotlight on them.  I don’t even like to choose a party so I can go with my gut instincts when it’s time to vote.  I try not to listen to the propaganda or negative publicity that is running rampant around us.  How can you see the forest through the trees in this case?  How is one supposed to not be affected by the negative environment that is created?  A anti-feminist jab at Hillary Clinton, a stupid idiot jab at Donald Trump, a socialist jab at Bernie Sanders- are any less impactful than the rest?  Do any hurt someone more than the others?   I tend to think it’s all planting seeds in people’s minds so they accept this as their reality.  I think most intelligent human beings would pause when they hear/ read or are otherwise exposed to this and consider all angles, but probably not. It’s getting easier and easier in our world today to let others think for you and to accept the easy way out.  I like to try to find a positive spin on each negative thing unleashed on us… sometimes, it is a stretch and I have to let it be what it is, but sometimes… there are 2 or 3 sides to the story- facts are omitted, truth is stretched, one point of many is emphasized to skew the readers attention.  This creates people fixating on one issue and not the myriad of issues that they should be thinking about.  I like to form my own opinions- whether popular or now- for better or for worse.  Just saying…

So, do I have negative tendencies?  Occasionally despite my trying not to, yes, I do.  I am human.  But, I try to find the shades of gray between all the black and white negativity out there.

Nothing and no one is black and white truly.  

Finding your shade of gray… where you fit in, where you are defined as a unique individual… should be the goal we have in our society.  If one day, your shade of gray doesn’t look so good anymore, if you evolve in another direction and the company you keep does not, then that is OK.  That is a choice you make. Remember, gray is a neutral color but it doesn’t have to be worn by a boring, neutral person.  Gray is what you make of it!