Holiday in the Hospital

Sometimes the unexpected happens during the most inconvenient times… maybe it’s the universe testing us to see how well we can adapt, change, rise to the challenge and persevere.  This happened to me and my family over the holidays and I haven’t felt more tested in one year than in 2015.  Seeing the forest through the trees and understanding the “why” of these things is happening over time and I am appreciating the fact that I am even here to realize them.

Let’s see how it’s all connected and what life is leading up to…

First, I was laid off in March 2015. Devastating news at first, but a blessing in disguise to come.

Next, I had disc replacement surgery on my neck in May 2015.  This put plans to find work on hold temporarily, but I soon realized that my recovery afforded me the opportunity to do more research and due diligence while exploring my future career options.

Then, my mom had surgery in December.  This is where the curve ball comes in.  What was supposed to be a routine knee replacement turned into quite an ordeal… 5 days in the hospital, 1 blood clot, 6 days in a “skilled” nursing facility, 1 ER visit and countless visits from home health care providers.  My sister and I did not see this coming.  The good news is that we were together during this experience and our tribe mentality helped us get through it with our husbands and my son.  Seeing our mother in so much pain and crying out, whimpering, suffering- was hard pill to swallow to say the least.  There was no questions that our holidays were now about helping our mom recover.  They were about us all being together and that was that.  We were not going out partying and celebrating and lavishing everyone with gifts… this was the holiday season for helping someone we care about feel better and rest as comfortably as possible without the worries of household/ pet/ child care responsibilities.  We were willing to take care of everything.  Was it exhausting?  Yes.  Was it frustrating?  Yes.  Was it taking time away from other family members and responsibilities?  Yes.  But what we realized is that none of that matters.  What really matters is being there for each other- even in the toughest moments- getting upset, stressed out, fatigued, breaking down, etc.

My mom was a trooper indeed and now knows the true test of her strength and perseverance, so that is one of her learnings from this ordeal.    I see my mom working hard at recovering and I am her biggest champion in her efforts.  If it means putting some things on hold for a while, that is fine.  I accept that this is a path that I am on.  All of the events of 2015 and before, are leading up to this year and what it will hold for me and my family.  It is a restart button on our path in life.  This is a rare opportunity to start something new and build something from scratch- all the while learning from all of the events that led up to this year.

Do I want to dwell on the past?  No.  I want to leverage it for the future.  To not repeat mistakes, to not revert back to old habits & painful memories, to move beyond and experience realization.  I am staying positive and hopeful-looking forward to the future and what it holds for us.  It is very exciting to think of what looking back on 2016 will be like.  I predict it will be exhilarating and rewarding… a wild ride, this life that I am grateful to be living.

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